James Coming Out at School Plus Telling Family and Close Friends

James told us that he wanted to come out fully at school so we told him it was fine.  Around the same time I sent an email to our family and close friends. James had approved the email that I was going to send out.

When James came home, I asked how things went at school.  He said it was fine and the class clapped for him.  I told him if he ever runs into trouble, tell a teacher, principal, or the office.  He then told me that his school has trans bathrooms that he has been using.  I remember thinking WOW what a great school and so progressive.James at this time did go to a small school that had 30 grade eight kids.  He went to graduation wearing black dress pants, white shirt, and blue tie.  He looked so handsome.  I was tearing up. I then emailed the teachers plus principal and office staff saying I give them permission to call him James and that he will be handing in work with this name on it. Everyone at the school was so supportive.  He lost no friends.  I was so relieved at this.

Below is the email that I sent out to family and close friends. I wish I could take credit for this great idea but I cannot.  I saw this on a website or documentary or interview that I saw when I did my initial research of what exactly is transgender.  I worked on this email for MANY days.  I cannot tell you how many times I revised it.James approved this.

” Hi Everyone –

You are receiving this email as you are family or a close friend.

I am writing to you to inform you about something that is personal in nature, but will result in some changes.

Sara has told us that she is transgender. The name she goes by is James and would like to be referred to as he.

We will not be answering any questions. We love our child, stand behind this decision, and are proud.

We are trying to create a safe place for James in our home plus the homes he visits.

I know this may take time for you to understand and hope that you can support us in this transition.


James Parents”

We were so surprised by the amount of support we received.  We received phone calls and emails almost immediately. This was such a relief.

James comments – he told me that he cried when he told his entire class.  He finds it funny how he cried telling his class but not the close friends and family.

Author: transchildren

I am a 47 year old female mom with 2 great sons. This is our story about a transgender child. I have lots to learn. I look forward to this adventure.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s